What’s the biggest life hack that you have ever heard? Well, today, I am going to tell you a little “secret”.
This past mont has taught me a lot about myself – or, I suppose it’s reminded me of the ongoing exploration of what it means to show up fully as my whole self in my life as both a professional and as a “normal, messy, humbled human being” – beyond my work, achievements or accomplishments.
It all started with some (casual) questions
Who am I when I’m not producing?
When I am not performing, pretending, or trying to “fit in”?
Who am I outside of everything else?
Who am I *really*?
These are the questions I asked myself last month.
So I sat down. Just me, a pen in my palm and a blank page in front of me.
Who am I?
I started making a list – out of habit – with everything that came to mind. I am Nila (a)..
Human being. Psychologist. Nutritionist. Yoga teacher. Brand manager. Author. Creator. Coach. Guide. Mentor. Professional listener. Space holder. Ed survivor. Nature lover. Occasional overthinker. Daughter. Sister. Friend. Deeply curious Introvert. Seeker of everyday beauty…
I am.
(and my name is Nila).
If I were to slap a sign beside myself, with an arrow pointing in my direction, it would say something like… “highly sensitive, awkward, deeply curious, and probably off in some other realm somewhere trying to figure out the meaning of life. Please, come back later.” (But I like to keep that private… most of the time at least.)
The ‘secret’ hack
Truth be told, I don’t have it all figured out. And I may never. But I’m learning to be more and more okay with that. And it’s become so rewarding to just don’t know who I am sometimes and to know that’s okay. To know that I still belong, that I’m still worthy as a human first.
Every now and then I have a lightbulb-moment where I think “ah this is who I really am”. Most often it will be somewhere in nature, in the early morning when the wind drops and the light hits just so. Sometimes, it will be after closing the laptop after a deep-dive session with a precious client – being proud of how fas she has already come on her journey and how lucky I am to be right here witnessing her in her be(com)ing. Sometimes, it will be belly laughing with friends when I can just. be. me.
Mostly, I find myself performing different roles, but what remains is me.
The human being beyond the doing.
I am. (and my name is Nila).
I am not living a “perfect” life. I am not always happy; I still overthink and I still long for things and I don’t have the dream house with my rose garden and 3 kids at my side. And yet… I am living. I’m fully in my life, experiencing it and scooping it up right in the beautiful truth of it. In this moment, I’m who I want to be – not what is expected of me, not what is perfect – and I am not waiting or compromising. This is me – being here, every day, feeling “yes, this is me”. This is me living.
My invitation: Disconnect to reconnect
We are so obsessed with our reach, while we have unlearned to connect – and disconnect. Learning to disconnect to reconnect is so so important in todays society! When we truly disconnect from any external distractions, we get to learn so much more about ourselves than while scrolling through our social media feeds watching others living their lives!
The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. Whether you like is or not: You are the person who will always be there. With you. Wherever yo go.
The biggest (good) life hack
“The ‘biggest life hack’ is being exactly who you are (even though it may also be the hardest thing you’ll ever do.)” – Nila
The Good Life is not about trying to improve yourself or get anywhere else, but simply to fall in love with who and where you already are. It’s about discovering what we’re capable of and learning from our challenges in life to remember who we came here to be in the first place and embrace all of who we are – the mess and the beauty, flaws and sparks – everything included… because you are you and that is beautiful, courageous and (more than) enough.
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